Friday, February 5, 2010

28 Weeks & Keeping My Identity


Ok, I will start this off with the obvious disclaimer. I can't wait to be a mom and I am BEYOND excited for this baby boy. Like, beyond excited, anxious, ecstatic, yadda yadda yadda. Really!

That being said, I have some fears about becoming a "mommy", and I would love feedback from all the other moms out there.

I am afraid of losing my identity. I'm afraid of becoming so engrossed in my child that I forget about the person I spent the last 27 years becoming... because I like that person.

Now, I know what everyone says: your life changes in ways you never imagined were possible and it's all amazing and for the best. Priorities change. Budgets change. Husband-wife dynamics change. Yeah, this is what I'm nervous about.

How will I adjust?

Will I miss working 40 hours a week and meeting with government officials and attorneys on a daily basis?

Will I still browse through the proposed Environmental Bills being discussed in the legislative session that year?

Will I mind trading in my high heels and dressy work clothes for slippers and anything comfy that I don't mind getting poop or throw up on?

These are the things I think about. I don't think anyone knows exactly what it'll be like until it happens. But I think it's already happening... I mean, I already have to wrack my brain about things to blog about other than Baby, and it's gonna get even harder after he comes, right??

Anyone else out there make the switch from 3-4 years of building a career to becoming a mom?

I'd be interested in some thoughts.

28 Weeks

The weeks are flying by. Except for when I think about how much time is left... then things feel like a snail's pace. But seriously, I feel like it was yesterday that I was posting about V-Day and that was a MONTH ago. Crazy!

Baby N. is over 15" long from head to toe and weighs over 2 pounds, like a big head of Chinese Cabbage.

We had our 28 week appointment this morning and all looks well. We start going every 2 weeks now, which is super exciting. I'm growing, the Baby's growing, so far nothing out of the ordinary has come up. Knock on wood.

We started our childbirth classes this week and it was SUPER interesting. Even Sam was totally engrossed in everything the instructor was saying and it was all super useful. Although, when it came time to watch the video of the delivery I understood why it's not quite time for me to give birth yet... I'm not totally pushed to the limit of this pregnancy where I'm willing to do... ummm, what I saw on the video.

OUCH.

8 comments:

  1. It hurts but not that bad...take a lot of drugs and you will be fine. I think what helped me was taking an hour a day to my self. Being a mom is the best job in the world ,but sometimes it is over whelming so you need a little brake!

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  2. Amy,
    Okay, I had to login so I could comment on your concerns about motherhood. I fight this little battle everyday. You go from being praised and having intellectual conversations daily, to being (some days) isolated and in charge of this adorable little creature that eats and sleeps and poops and cries. It IS an adjustment. Of course it's worth it, but there is a balance.

    I read a LOT! Newspapers, books, magazines, you name it. It keeps me feeling mentally sharp and gets me that interaction with the world that I crave and miss. Facebook helps too;) And take advantage of the time your hubby is home to go for a run or something.

    Sorry so long. BTW, send me your email address and I will invite you to our blog...not that I update it very often. k_lynne1@hotmail.com

    Good luck!

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  3. Amy.. You will FIGURE it all out.. finding a GOOD balance is KEY in everything INCLUDING being a MOM:) Korry LOVES it when I work my 6 hours a month:) HE gets to be stay at home DAD and I get to go HANGOUT with the funny girls at work:) BEING a MOMMY ROCKS!!! I know its only been a little over a year since IVE BEEN A MOM but it has been the MOST rewarding thing Ive ever done!! Sounds cheesy BUT ITS TRUE! Thats our story.. AND WE MISS YOU GUYS!! No need to worry about anything except what your baby is going to where home from the Hospital:):)

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  4. It can be an adjustment, but the way you feel about that baby makes everything worth it and it'd all fall into place. You'll get into your own groove and somehow you just figure it out. When possible, take some time for yourself. I have a group of friends that stay at home and we get together often to go to parks, museums, etc and it helps to have some adult conversation. You're getting so close! SO exciting!!!

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  5. Oh Darn! I hate that when Matt's signed in! :)

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  6. I was worried about going from being the bread winner to staying home and changing diapers, but I wouldn't change it now. It was an adjustment for sure, but once you find your routine and groove, all will be well.

    This has been said, but make time for yourself. I would feel guilty to ask Carl for help when he would get home because he had been working all day,(even though I had too, :) ) so a lot of times I tried to do things myself, but you NEED to let Sam help you when you need a break. I'm sure he won't mind to spend some quality time with the little guy so you can go to your spin class :) He is the daddy, after all!

    I love you! I can go on and on....but I won't. You can always call me if you need more suggestions.

    ps...aren't those birthing videos the greatest? Soooo scary!!! But I had an epidural, so it was alllll good :)

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  7. You are looking SOOO cute! I loved this stage of pregnancy!

    I don't know that you CAN balance life in the beginning. It is ALL about baby, learning to feed, find out what she needs/wants, sleeping, and feeding yourself. It seems that some days I barely squeeze in a good shower. I always thought the extreme sleep deprivation and monotonous routine of diapers, feeding you and baby, and sleep were overexagerated by people. BUT it is true and it is life for now. I know that it won't always be like this and I know I will get myself back one day, but for now it is just surviving and actually it is wonderful. Our little ones are totally dependent on us. And even at 3 in the morning when I can hardly tell if I'm coming or going I love looking down at my little baby while I feed her and am just filled with love.

    Everyone says things calm down, so I trust that, but I also think it has to be a decision that you won't lose yourself. I know you won't and I know you will be a great mom!

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  8. i'm not sure i can say anything that hasn't been said by someone already, but i thought i needed to add my 2 cents. i actually wasn't EVER a "career woman" thanks to getting pregnant a little sooner than i had hoped, but life definitly changed nonetheless. lets just say i didn't leave my house for about 9 months after luke was born. partly because we moved to the bitter winter tundra of spokane, wa and partly because i just really didn't know what to do with myself.
    i'm sure you have plenty of friends/hobbies and that is exactly what you need. use them. love your little baby and cherish all the time you spend with him, but find that balance for his and your sake. you will and you will love it.

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