Tuesday, January 18, 2011

the truth about bein' a mom.

back in the day, i had a LOT of anxiety about becoming a mom.  i liked my pre-baby life & although i was ecstatic to start our family, i was also somewhat afraid of all the changes people said having a baby would bring.

when i was a full-time career girl i would check facebook during breaks & read status update after status update of complaints from stay-at-home moms.  "my kid won't sleep", "i'm up to my elbows in poop", "i can't get anything done", "i would kill for a shower."  you get the idea.  i remember sitting there at my desk thinking, "really?  is it that hard?  i would LOVE to stay at home in my pajamas & play with a kid all day."  it sounded pretty sweet.

granted, i've only been a mom to my one outside baby for about nine months, but here's my answer to that question as i've experienced motherhood thus far.  is being a mom that hard?

yes.  and no.

honestly?  being a stay at home mom is pretty sweet.  i'm pretty fortunate in that i stay home with parker six days a week & i get to go into the office to work one day a week.  it's a great balance.  i get to play with p-ray for hours every day, go on play dates, go on walks, work out, blog, go to target, etc., & on my day in the office i get to dress up, interact with adults, make important decisions, use my brain, listen to loud music while commuting alone, & eat lunch out kid-free.

so what was i so afraid of back when i had all these "becoming a mom" anxieties?  well, i thought having kids would suck because i had heard so many complaints & horror stories from other moms.  i mean, how many times have you heard things like "being a mom is the hardest thing you will EVER do", "a mom's work is never done", or "my clothes are constantly covered in poop & spit up"?  probably a couple.  hundred.  at least.

and you know what?  those things are true.  i've only been a mom for nine months, but i can already attest to the truth of each of those things at one point or another.  and other moms love to tell me it only gets harder.  parker will start to talk back, he'll throw tantrums, he won't nap as long, he won't nap at all, he'll run away from me in stores, he'll have to be potty trained, & there might come a day when he doesn't think it's so cool to snuggle with me on the couch.  or put his head on my shoulder while i hold him.

hearing these things makes me ask myself, "ok... so if being a mom is so dang hard, why do you have kids?"  and here is where i'm gonna tell you the truth about being a mom... the part you don't hear enough:

because?  it is worth it.  the rewards FAR outweigh the trials.  it is amazing.  your baby smiles at you.  he will coo & giggle & speak to you in the softest little baby voice.  he will hug you & say "mama."  when you walk around the side of your car to get him out of his car seat, his entire body will light up at the sight of you.  and that?  is worth it all.

and even though parker is gonna grow up & have some nasty moments & it will get harder, i know that the rewards will only get greater.  he'll be able to tell me what he likes & dislikes.  he'll tell me he loves me.  he'll run to me when he gets hurt & ask me to kiss it better.  he'll sing, he'll laugh, & he'll draw me pictures. 

and he will always be MY baby.  i will always be HIS mom.  it might be hard at times, but it will always be worth it.


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38 comments:

  1. just so you know.. i am literally crying writing this comment. all of it is true and i am so blessed to be experiancing being Seth's mom.
    the photo is so perfect for the post and it's absolutely beautiful and precious. thanks for this post. you couldn't have said it any more perfectly.

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  2. Soooobbbbbfffeeesssstttt! This is so true!!!

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  3. I LOVE this post I feel the same way. That picture just melts my heart. so sweet!!

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  4. Such a great post. I can't WAIT to have kids!

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  5. Well said! Yes, lots of "horror stories" but they aren't all the time. Plus some people are just overly dramatic about all things related to their child, good and bad.

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  6. I have to start reading your posts later in the day. It's far too early to be weeping. I was even holding it together pretty well until I saw the photo at the end.
    Damn you two. Stop being so sweet and cute.

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  7. Love it, I 100% agree. It is worth it. Coming from someone who never wanted children until I met my husband, deciding to have a baby was one of the best decisions I ever made. Good post I say =)

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  8. Awesome post! So very true and it becomes more worth it as the years go by and you see your own little ones become amazing parents! You, Sam and Parker are so blessed to have each other! Love you. oxoxo

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  9. Just wanted to add that Motherhood is the hardest job anyone will ever have and yes, it is worth it. What I think people fail to remember is that even though complaints fly out there about not having time away (most stay-at-home mom's are just that and don't get a chance to get out once/week...I know I rarely did)and the pitfalls of potty-training, spit ups, etc., what they don't mention is that they wouldn't change it for the world. Complaints come in ANY line of work but it's easiest to complain about the work of motherhood because people actually understand what you're complaining about. It's not that you'd change your life, you just need time to vent. And yes, as kids get older, it brings on different struggles...but on the plus side, it also has it's easy moments too. And all of them are rewarding!

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  10. Thank you for this honest post. I really enjoyed reading it. The time in my life to become a mom will be soon and I'm anxious/nervous as well. So I really loved hearing the truth about being a mommy :)

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  11. Love this. And although I don't have children yet, this post makes me very excited to someday be a mom! :)

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  12. great...now I'm all weepy! Parker is one lucky little dude.

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  13. Very well said. I think these things all of the time! Those cliche sayings are true, being a Mother is very hard. But you are absolutely right, the rewards make everything SO worth it!! Being a Mom is the best! Spit up, poop, temper tantrums and all!!

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  14. What a great post!!! So so sweet.

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  15. Love it! But I shouldn't be reading this at school because it made me cry :)

    Thanks for writing this. Your words are very touching.

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  16. Beautiful post Amy! I feel the same way!

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  17. sooo soo true! You are such a great mom Amy! Keep it up girl. I lovvvveeee that picture a whole lot!

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  18. What a sweet picture and what a sweet post! I love it. All in life I ever wanted to be was a mom, and there are days where I find myself tired, cranky, and ready to hand her off so I can nap, but life without her wouldn't be worth is. Life with her is a life full of LIFE!

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  19. I love this and I love you.
    each stage brings a new trial and obstacle to hurdle, but it gradually comes on. It's not like in a days time he is running away from you....or maybe it is:) just kidding. But what I'm saying is you WILL be ready for each new trial, whether you think you are or not. And it is worth it.

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  20. Great post and sooo very true. I love that photo.

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  21. Such a fantastic post. I don't have kids (yet...?) and have been on the fence about being a mom (eventually) because of all the hard things you mentioned. But all the things that you say make it worth it are worth changing my mind over... eventually :)

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  22. Love this post. I'm 24 weeks pregnant with my first. Although I'm excited, I'm also terrified. Insight from other moms is always helpful and makes it seem a little less daunting.

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  23. AMEN sister. Every moment...worth it. The good and the sleepless poo covered ones.

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  24. While it does get harder as they get older and throw fits, there is NOTHING more amazing than when your baby tells you they love you for the first time. Or when they get up from playing and say, "momma, I want a kiss" love.it!

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  25. awwww...I LOVE this. It is so true. It is hard and easy all at once. I wouldn't trade being a SAHM for the world, although I get the allure of working too--it's very cool you have the best of both worlds! ps what a cutie pie!

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  26. this post makes me want to hug you. so, **HUG**

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  27. im gonna be in a new mom in literally 2 weeks maybe that, and this is just what i needed to hear im super excited but i was kinda nervous but thank you so much for making the best experience im about to go through even better

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  28. Hey I was looking at some of my old posts and saw your comment... 4 months later! I think I'll be looking at your blog for inspiration. :) I need to get back to frequent updates and picture taking! Do you know Mandy from a sorta fairytale too?

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  29. Amen. It's so common to hear complaints but so refreshing to hear the joys. Motherhood rocks! It is hard - but it's also so fulfilling...and lots of times in our case, comical. Beautiful post.

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  30. It's easy to get into the habit of complaining about the trials of motherhood. But even people who were postive, happy people before they had children will look back and say they didn't laugh or smile nearly as much then as they do now. Nor did they feel the power of that TRUE kind of love a mom has for her baby.

    Worth It.

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  31. Yep. It's hard sometimes, but mostly it's awesome. An "I Love you" from Madeline and a belly laugh from Charlie is pure happiness!

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  32. Absolutely wonderful post! I don't have kids, and I know I'll have anxiety whenever my time may come. However, this post put a nice glimmer on the whole bein' a mom idea :)

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  33. You hit the nail on the head! I've always felt this way too and you spelled it out perfectly! It is all SO true. Thank you for sharing that. ;0) I'm a new reader btw. Great blog!

    Steph

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  34. This post is SO true. Many times we focus on the negative and forget to acknowledge the positive. Thanks for the reminder.I have added you to my blog roll :)

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